You love your hubby and you've got a good thing going for ya, but let's be honest, your day-to-day routine doesn't exactly have relationship time scheduled in. Being a happy couple is no secret, in fact according to Redbook Magazine, there are 8 things that most happy couples do every single day to keep the "happy" in their happy ever after.
1. They stop to say “hello”: Research shows that how you spend the first four minutes of the evening at home sets the tone for the rest of the night. So even if you got there first and are in the middle of a thrilling scene of Orange Is the New Black, press pause when your husband walks in the door. “Stop what you’re doing and hug him,” says couples therapist Bob Taibbi. “A hug, even for 10 seconds, increases oxytocin, the brain chemical that makes you feel connected. It’s a nightly ritual to stay bonded.”
2. They bicker: Arguing over little things, like that time he forgot to write his share of the thank-you notes after your son’s birthday party, is not only completely normal, it’s also beneficial. According to a study published in American Psychologist, getting angry with your spouse and being able to recognize the behaviors you don’t appreciate can actually help your marriage in the long-term. If you become too upset to articulate why you’re mad, say it in an email, suggests Karen Elizaga, life coach and author of Find Your Sweet Spot. “Lay out the reasons why you're upset, offer up some solutions, and remind him that you love him.” The moment it takes to your collect and type out your thoughts will help set the stage for a more productive conversation once you’ve calmed down. Plus, there’s a better chance your husband will absorb your words if he reads them, rather than listening to you scream them.
3. They celebrate each other: Sure, it’s important that you support each other when something bad happens, he loses his job or your childhood pet passes away, but a study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that how couples react to each other's good news may be even more important than how they help each other cope with sadness. The next time he scores the walk-off run in his company softball game, crack open his favorite craft brew, or post a victorious shot of him to Instagram to show him how proud you are.
4. They have fun together: We know it sounds totally obvious, but it’s science. Research done at the University of Denver showed that couples who make time for fun activities stay together longer. “The correlation between fun and marital happiness is high and significant,” says Howard Markman, Ph.D., codirector of the University of Denver’s Center for Marital and Family Studies. “The more you invest in fun and friendship, the happier the relationship will be.” So play a round of HeadsUp, go to an amusement park (without the kids), or if you’re short on time, try one of these quickie date ideas.
Want to see what else happy couples do? Click here to be taken to the original story on Redbook.