To all of my dear friends & followers, my dad is losing his battle with cancer. And the sadness I feel is a burden beyond which I can shoulder alone.
(Side note: I know many of you come to this blog for fun & fabulous inspiration – and trust me, I DO NOT judge you for being like “eh, I’ll read the next post when we are back to lipstick, chic wardrobe, & cocktails!” Trust me! I would much prefer sharing with you all of that fabulousness as well! So if you do not wish to read the rest of this post, I hope you have an amazing day and can’t wait to have you back to share awesomeness next week!)
And for those of you who are still reading, this blog is an outlet for me – and right now I happen to be grieving and if some of you are too, let’s try to share the burden together.
Four years ago (on my husband’s birthday, actually) my dad was diagnosed with stage 4 colon and liver cancer and my life hasn’t been the same since. In those four years, my life has had incredible highs and the lowest of lows dealing my dad’s diagnosis. He has had successful treatments, fought like a maniac, and not given up. Not for one second. But this disease will eventually take his life. And as his time on earth comes to a close, I can’t help but feel the physical pain of what his loss will mean to my life.
With that said, I don’t think God gives us grief or loss in a way to hurt, humiliate, or harm us. But rather, to show us how love permeates our life in other ways. The God that I know & love will always love me back. And through this season of my life (and my dad’s life) there has always been joy. There is joy in each phone call that I have with my dad. In every memory that makes me smile (did anyone else’s dad celebrate “pancake saturday” with the kind of relish that mine exemplified on a weekly basis??) My dad has always been quick with a laugh, loving, kind, and patient – and for a man with four daughters, I’m fairly certain that hasn’t always been easy!
So through this grief, pain, sadness, and sorrow, I choose love. Let’s all cherish, honor, laugh, love and hope every.single.day.
Helen Keller said, “What we have once enjoyed deeply we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.” So I’m choosing love. I’m going to love my dad every day for the rest of my life, and especially for the rest of his. I’m going to love & appreciate the memories we have shared. I’m going to love my family as we travel this road together. And I’m going to accept the love that is given to me through this journey.
If your heart is heavy right now, feel free to share your burden right here and I promise that I will lift you up in prayer. Let’s be here for each other, and remember that LOVE WINS.
Love never fails. 1 Cor. 8. Thank you for opening your heart & allowing me to share this with you.